Moments of Silliness

I have recently made contact with an old "shipmate" from the INDEPENDENCE, a guy I used to run around Norfolk with. His name is Fran Ankenbrand, but we just used to call him "Ank," for short. If I'm not mistaken, we met when I rented a "room" in an apartment in Portsmouth, VA. The "room" was actually a bed, in a room, but we managed to work things out. It was a townhouse, with two bedrooms, one bathroom, a huge living room, and a full kitchen. There were, at any given time, between four and seven people living in the apartment.

I had an Opel Cadet, station wagon, that ran well, and took us out to Virginia Beach, on days we could afford the toll roads. On one particular, very pleasant, very sunny day, Ank, one of the roommates, and I took off for the Beach. We started in a bar that was on the Boardwalk, if you don't count the drugs we had taken before we left, and had a couple of beers. We decided to walk down the Boardwalk, for a while, and either stopping at another bar, or going swimming. When we passed the last bar on the Boardwalk, we sat down on the wall (actually a high curb), to decide whether we were going to the bar, or swimming. The illegal substances we had ingested earlier were starting to "kick in," I guess, that's the only reason I can think of for what happened next.

In retrospect, I really feel sorry for the two elderly ladies, who walked, unwittingly, into one of the most insane things I've ever (to this day, in fact) seen a person do. Ank was, as I remember, a thin, wiry kind of guy, who at the time was sporting a Van Dyke, kind of whispy, but fully noticable, and neatly trimmed. I knew Ank was a little crazy, we did some pretty harmless things that could have killed us, but I never expected this.

He was standing on the inner wall, and hopped down, right in front of the two elderly women, and started to sing the "Lolipop Guild" bit from the Wizard of Oz. He started doing the little dance, as he sang:

"Weee represent the Lolipop Guild,

The Lolipop Guild,

The Lolipop Guild.

An in behalf of the Lolipop Guild,

We present you with this lol-li-pop.

Here!"

At which time he stuck out an empty fist, austensibly holding the lolipop. I thought, although the whole thing lasted maybe two seconds, that the women were about to have heart attacks, or something, but they quickly squirted around Ank, and took off as fast as they could.

Now, remember, I'm watching this as I am collapsing on the Boardwalk, in gales of laughter from the "Weee..." It was instant recognition of what he was doing, coupled with the total outrageousness, and that it was thought up and executed in seconds, I laughed until it began to hurt. And the look on Ank's face as he did it; he somehow made himself look Munchkin-ish, it was hilarious.

There were other, weirdly fun things done in that apartment, from the all-night Dealer McDope games, to flash-gun tag, and chasing a stoned hamster who probably had too much LSD. We were sailors. We were on an extended overhaul, and in our Homeport for a year. We were trying to have fun, and generally succeeded.